America - The Streets are Paved with Gold

So, we put on our posh frocks and went to Vegas.

Wham! lied; drinks are not free in Club Tropicana. There is, however, enough fun and sunshine for everyone.* Rather a lot of sunshine, in fact. 38 degrees celsius most days. Las Vegas sits like a mirage in the middle of an enormous, hot, dusty desert, and suddenly pops out at you like a brightly-coloured painting when you turn a corner.

But it’s wonderful, so very wonderful. Yes, tacky, with a fake Eiffel Tower next to the fake Statue of Liberty by the fake Luxor Temple, but it’s all so big and shiny! I really did think I’d hate it, but now I am utterly convinced that there is no better place to go to party.

We arrived at lunchtime and staggered down the Strip (the famous bit with the best clubs in) ducking in and out of casinos to try get some water. The road is bizarre; you have to try really hard to go down it in a straight line. To get across some bits you need to enter a casino and follow the walkways. We’d heard that they hid the exits in the casinos, but thought we’d manage. We were wrong. Once inside, there are no clear walkways, just enormous foyers full of machines and bars and no sense of direction or daylight whatsoever. It took us over 4 hours to get to the other end, and many instances of desperately asking someone the way out.

There’s plenty to see on the way. There are those big famous fountains, which are incredibly loud as they shoot water high into the air, a volcano with a good amount of kerosene, and a pirate ship fight where one lifesize ships sails up from somewhere else, there is a huge and very hot battle and it sinks. There were also semi-naked women, but I think they had to be scantily clad to survive the fireballs. Encroyable!

Even better than that, though, I made money. I sit here now as living proof that the house does not always win, with my 600% profit. Okay, so it was one $2, but still I’m rather pleased. Here’s a picture of me and Greg holding our winning voucher (you don’t get money out of the machines, but a ticket you can either put into other machines or cash. The machines still make the noise of coins clattering when they pay out, though, even though you are only able to put notes in), looking rather hot:

See photos section for other tacky ones.

* ^{Yes, I know they’re talking about Ibiza, but after seeing Club Tropicana no one could stop singing the song for days.}